Bentleys One Month Well Checkup

Today started off pretty good. I woke up early this morning and just layed there and watched Bentley sleep. He looks so peaceful when he is asleep. I wish I could sleep like that. And he sleeps through almost anything. Most new moms would love it when their new baby gives them a little break and goes to sleep. But I love, seeing Bentley awake. I love looking into his big beautiful eyes knowing, that for as long as God allows me, I'll be looking into Bentleys eyes, which I like to think will be forever. He just has a little twinkle in them & their so big I could get lost in them forever. Bentley started early intervention this morning, even though we just did paper work today, the lady was extremely nice and I can't wait to see how much progress he will make when he gets started.

Bentley also had a Drs. appointment for his one month well checkup. Yes!! A month, it seems like yesterday, I was in the hospital with my new little bundle of joy. He weighed 8lb 8oz. today and was 20 3/4 inches long! He is getting so big!! Well in my eyes anyways. Dr. Cerjan said he is a little small for his age, but it will be okay. We'll just watch him and see how he progresses. He also got his 2nd vaccine for heppatitis b. And it completely broke my heart! At first he was laying there being the happy little baby that he is & then the nurse sticks the shot in his leg he looks at me and lets out this unimaginable screams, turns blood red, and held his breath, and then cried. Cried like I had never hear him cry before. I just held him and rocked him until he stopped. And those little crocodile tears that he has, just makes it worse!

I love him more than I ever thought possible and I know that will never change. I love it when he look at me and grabs hold of my finger, it just makes my heart melt. Hes even started to grin a little bit and what a cute little grin it is!! Mommy loves you Bentley Dean!!

Now Bentley is just snoozing away, & I'm pretty sure he'll sleep good tonite cause he has had a long day.

I'll leave you guys with this poem that I was given about down syndrome.

Welcome to Holland

by Emily Perl Kingsley

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability- to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It’s like this…

When you’re going to have a baby, it’s like planning a fabulous vacation trip -to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It’s all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, “Welcome to Holland.” ” Holland?!?” you say. “What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I’m supposed to be in Italy. All my life I’ve dreamed of going to Italy.”

But there’s been a change in the flight plan. They’ve landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is they haven’t taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It’s just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It’s just a different place. It’s slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you’ve been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around… and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills… and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy…and they’re all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say “Yes, that’s where I was supposed to go. That’s what I had planned.”

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away… because the loss of that dream is a very, very significant loss.

But… if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely hings …about Holland.